T\|\|0

Serenity.
The only thing I want to feel
is you by my side
The only thing I want to hear
is your whisper inside.
Your laugh
Your smile
Your nibbles
drive me wild.
Your arms around me
Never let me be.
You hold me and
I feel
I feel
That you are my Serenity.

Am I still your Xanax? The one who will always make you happy?
Will I always make you feel bright?

I want to be your everything. I want to be your superstar.
I want to shine brighter than the sun.
I want.
I want.

What do you want?

I feel like I'm floating on a cloud. My mind fogged by a cloudy smog. Feeling like the way I do, makes me wonder if you want it to be just me and you. My throat hurts and I feel so dry. Tired and worn out and yet, I'm still alive.
I want to do everything for you. I want to show you that you are better than the rest. To hold you and let you feel my heartbeat and know that forever I will love you. Forever is not even real, but I wish it could be because it feels like if forever were real then you possibly loving me would be real too. Maybe loving me isnt as big as forever.. Its not that I'm in love with you, and its not that you should worry or even care about this. Its that your my best friend and you make me smile, and I just want to stop hurting for awhile. I know I rhyme and thats okay, but maybe itll make you read this faster and help you think longer. Maybe one day youll say you love me, and maybe one day Ill say it back. Our smiles so wide, our hearts so close, california in our eyes.

I want this to be more then just some stupid relationship.
It seems these words keep repeating themselves.
Maybe I should stop and tell you something.
Tell you a secret

Maybe one day, not today, Ill tell you something that will blow you away. So you better listen otherwise It may slip up and youll never know.



xxxx


I had a good day today, except for later today when I had a little bad moment and got a little depressed. I worried about everything, loosing you, loosing friends, disappontment and what not, but I think I should get over it and stop worrying, let myself go. I hope I'm a good person, and I hope I will succeed.
I hope my friends will always love and forgive me.

I believe everyone can change if they want. I believe that no one is the same even in the course of a few years. I believe that no matter what if you change or not youll always be the same old person that I decided to care about. I care about all of you, no matter what they say. I never cheat, I never lie, not to you. I may lie to my parents but thats only rare. I respect my mother and I respect you too. I respect everyone if they give me a chance too.

I hope one day, Ill be trusted and loved. One day Ill find that someone and stop worrying.
One day.

but right now, I want to take this one day at a time.
and Im happy where I am right now.